Finding an outlet to express your worries, symptoms and fears can be a life-saver. Working out the right option for you can be daunting, at a time when you may have little energy and patience. So in this blog I explore the support options out there, both professional and self-help, along with some pointers to help you navigate them. But essentials first:
For emergency medical attention…
Please go to your local A&E, get a GP emergency appointment, or call 999.
MIND ‘I need urgent support’ on their home page, select it and as well as sharing emergency information, it also leads their toolbox
Samaritans 116 123 Listening service for all 24/7
Shout – 85258 confidential 24/7 text messaging support service for anyone struggling to cope.
Suicide prevention
Calm (targeting men) and Papyrus (young people)
Search 'NHS' and your area and the Trust website will have a mental health section including crisis lines and alternative drops-in to A&E (often not the best environment for mental health)
Worldwide crisis support Befrienders
Download this valuable Stay Alive app for advice and helplines including Papyrus that focuses on supporting young people, and CALM which targets men, as well at the Samaritans.
Give us a SHOUT is a crisis texting service
Visit Staying safe to learn about making a safety plan
There are no right or wrong answers, you’re on a journey of discovery, with plenty of ups and downs, that only you can take. You’ll need to dig deep, especially when you come up against unhelpful processes and, yes, sometimes unhelpful people. But we’re all more courageous than we think we are and it’s not a journey you should have to make alone.
If you’re not quite ready to dive in, why not take a look at my article Taking that first step to finding support or have a read about….
You may have thought that the Samaritans isn’t for someone like you, well ANYONE can call, you don’t have to be at crisis point, though lots of people are, they’re there to listen and that small act, absolutely saves lives. Find out What happened when Hattie Glad well called the Samaritans.
I learned that they are made up of volunteers who really care about mental health, and that they’re there for you 24/7 with no time limits on calls. I also found that they are not there to offer information or advice. They cannot tell you what to do. What they are there for is to listen. Simply listen. I knew that’s what I needed.
Your practical support to enable them to access a service could play a vital part role – what if, for example, enrolling on an anxiety support workshop required a telephone consultation, but one of their main anxiety triggers was using the phone, it’s not going to be an easy start!
As a supporter, you can offer to be with them whilst they make the call, offer to make the call for them, or even drive them there so they can explain in person that there needs to be flexibility to these processes. I’m pleased to report in this real case the individual was enrolled after a face-to-face meeting because of the support of a partner, but we need organisations to be more thoughtful with their procedures in the first place.
All the expert advice says to visit your GP in the first instance, and I’ll share some reasons why that can be a good idea, whilst being realistic about the challenges, and that this is likely to only be one part of the recovery jigsaw.
The gold standard is a thoughtful GP who not only listens but explores possible reasons for your symptoms, rather than one who just starts writing a prescription for medication before hearing your story. In the google age, we’re quick to self-diagnose, but a good GP should dig deeper. Questions to consider are:
Ideally your GP enables access to talking therapies, this is the premise of the IAPT (Adult Improving Access to Psychological Therapies) programme, though waiting lists are problematic. While you can find details of services available locally by typing in your postcode on the NHS choices website, the information isn’t always comprehensive so you might be better checking directly at your local surgery. Online therapy is an option too, here’s an example of options in Dorset where I’m based Steps 2 Wellbeing.
See Talking therapies -finding the right fit for alternative private options.
Your GP is always the gateway for referral to NHS psychiatrists and the Community Mental Health Team for more complex mental health issues, that’s a whole other area I won’t get into, but Rethink the charity can support here too.
And I’ll leave it to the experts MIND to help you with…
MIND has invaluable information in their user friendly guide Seeking Help for a mental health problem it also has advice for carers and more complicated areas such as what if your rights are restricted and when you might need an advocate.
Even if you have the luxury of a double appointment, time is short and it may be difficult for you to express on the spot the full story of why you’ve come. It’s well worth preparing if you can, here’s a handy guide and video from MIND Find the Words
We want everyone with a mental health problem who visits their GP practice to get the support that best suits their needs…However, it’s not always easy having that first conversation about your deepest feelings with your GP, someone you may hardly know.
GPs aren't always confident in mental health and are mixed in how up-to-date they are with all the services and options available. AGP buddy uses me as her 'go to' mental health resource bank and when I was volunteering at a Surrey mental health charity I used to drop leaflets to GP surgeries.
Don’t rely on one visit with one GP if you don’t find it helpful, visit another one and keep researching a range of support.
Maybe you were vaguely aware you have access to an EAP, but had forgotten, or are worried about confidentiality or you didn’t realise the range of issues that they can help with, from financial planning to gambling, stress, grief, relationship issues, suicidal thoughts….the list goes on.
EAPs are a mixed bag and have come under fire in recent years due to light regulation, but they can be an excellent starting point. As well as phone lines, there is plenty of online information and signposting as well as face-to-face counselling that can be arranged and companies only ever receive statistical, anonymous information so it remains entirely private.
Employers play their part by researching EAP options and understanding it is one aspect of support and not a sticking plaster for poor workplace practices. Promote the support as part of the onboarding process (from recruitment to probation) and then keep on promoting by linking it, where appropriate, to your general comms and make sure it’s easy to find on your intranet.
The value of a local support group is that it is so easy to self-refer and you can meet others and even start to feel part of a community. There are a huge range of options covering a variety of needs, from peer support groups for conditions such as depression, anxiety, eating disorders, bi-polar to more general wellbeing workshops and activities, including walking groups. If you don’t think it’s for you, even just visiting once is doing something. Even if it turns out not to be your thing, you might find someone interesting to talk to or pick up a useful leaflet.
Visit the fantastic Hub of Hope directory where over 800 mental health support organisations have registered and type in your postcode to find out what’s available near you. You can also locate out-of-hours support for anyone experiencing a mental health crisis or emotional distress.
The Safe Haven is a great example run by the empowering charity Oakleaf Enterprise in the Guildford, Surrey area. They also provide Wellbeing activities, Support groups, Counselling services and work-related training and are an asset to local business and community.
These help people improve their health and wellbeing through educational workshops on a range of psychological, mental and physical health conditions including: Understanding Medication, Managing Stress, Anxiety Management, Intro to Crisis planning, Intro to pain management and many more. They are free, run by an experienced facilitator and someone with lived experience and you self-refer.
I haven’t yet found a one-stop shop list of recovery colleges, it seems you have to search by particular area or region e.g. Nottingham Recovery college, South West Yorkshire, Greater Manchester. A quick search when I moved to North Dorset revealed the Dorset Recovery Education Centre, I'm looking forward to finding out more!
You might be referred to a therapist via your GP or decide to explore options yourself since waiting lists can be long and you may only be entitled to a limited number of sessions. A qualified therapist will use a variety of tools, according to your needs and where you are on your recovery journey.
Whatever their experience, qualifications and methods, you need to be the right fit for each other at a particular moment in your journey, so if you have that luxury, don’t be afraid to change therapists and/or the type of therapy if you don’t feel like you’re moving forward. I know someone who took three attempts and over a year before finding a therapist that enabled them to ‘feel like a person not a problem’.
MIND Talking Treatments information is a ‘go to’ for both NHS and private options, and have comprehensive information on CBT (Cognitive behavioural Therapy), too. This includes videos and a pdf booklet that references ways to access CBT.
If you’re looking for a local qualified counsellor or psychotherapist, I can recommend The counselling directory run by a passionate dedicated bunch based in Camberley that I’ve met. Their site also has a very useful I don’t know where to start section. Of course, there’s nothing like a recommendation from a trusted friend as a starting point.
Specialist organisations and helplines
There are a wealth of specialist websites valuable for being just that, specialist, run by people who have often set up the organisation to fill a gap, they include research, personal stories and online support.
Take BEAT for example, there’s a very enlightening section on what not to say to someone with an eating disorder and helpful alternatives.
Harmless is a user led organisation and provides a range of services about self-harm and suicide prevention. Like all these organisations they want to overcome stigma, educate and provide a real sense of hope.
Side by side is an online supportive community through MIND “a safe place to listen, share and be heard”.
In response to the limitations of a purely medical approach to psychosis, The Hearing Voices network provides a safe place for individuals to describe their voices, visions or other unusual perceptions, as a way to understand and learn to live with them, which can be incredibly empowering. It campaigns to put the individual and human language at the heart of their treatment and to ensure professionals start seeing the person rather than objectifying them as a ‘disorder’. Given the role of trauma and adversity…
We need to start asking ‘what has happened to you?’ rather than ‘what is wrong with you?’ - a Hearing Voices contributor
The Helplines Partnership offers a search function for numerous support organisations.
Our local library isn’t just for that holiday read, the Reading Well Shelf Help initiative sign posts helpful and engaging books around our mental health and challenging topics such as anxiety, bullying and body image. The programme has two strands: Books on Prescription and Mood-boosting Books.
Many people find blogging on platforms such as I am 1 in 4 empowering. It gives people a voice and can also be a great source of information if you want to put yourself in someone else’s shoes.
Understanding that our own brain and thinking patterns are our most powerful weapon, plays a major part in recovery. Regardless of whether you follow a formal programme of Cognitive Behavioural Therapy, challenging our thoughts and understanding they can be either helpful or unhelpful, is something we could all do more of. Here’s an extract from Guy Winch’s engaging Ted Talk.
Our thoughts Our minds and our feelings — they’re not the trustworthy friends we thought they were. They’re more like a really moody friend, who can be totally supportive one minute, and really unpleasant the next. By taking action when you’re lonely, by changing your responses to failure, by protecting your self-esteem, by battling negative thinking, you won’t just heal your psychological wounds, you will build emotional resilience, you will thrive.
Compassion for ourselves and compassion for others is the theme of Ruby Wax’s new book – How to be Human. With help from a monk (who tells us how our mind works) and a neuroscientist (who tells us how our brain works) she gives us insights into evolution, how it influences our thoughts, emotions, the body, addictions, relationships…and how we can “upgrade our mind and not just our iPhone!”
One of the tools she explains is mindfulness, and here’s a user-friendly introduction from practical, well-respected apps Headspace and Calm.
There’s no one size fits all –what’s helped you?
Hi, I’m Emma! With 30 years in Learning & Development and varied roles, I specialise in helping workplaces navigate the 'messy reality' of mental health conversations with confidence as part of a broader strategy. My experiences in a range of workplace settings, and as a mental health charity trustee and member of NHS suicide awareness working groups, drive me to provide practical approaches that create real impact. I ensure every session is engaging, down-to-earth, and actionable.
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